I always thought that if someone cheated on me,i'd leave. I'd pack my things and leave,never look back. In fact Donnie and I would often talk about it,if there was ever a moment where we felt the need or want to be with someone else,we'd tell the other person and figure out what we wanted to do from there. We would NEVER actually do it.
Donnie did it,he committed the ultimate betrayal. And I didn't leave,the thought never crossed my mind as he sat me down and cried uncontrollably after telling me he slept with his boss. Anger,hurt,confusion,they all crossed my mind,leaving didn't.
I don't know? I don't know if staying makes me stronger or if staying shows how very weak I am. Is it strength that makes me stay and work things out or am I just THAT self conscious? I don't know the reason,all I know is in spite of everything i've said in the past I could never leave. I don't feel in my heart that it would be the right decision. No matter how hard this is,no matter how my heart is breaking,this is my life and I have to deal with it.
2 comments:
oh honey i am sending you lots of hugs.
i am trying to figure out how to word this. i am going to give it a try. what others may think is not the right thing to do doesnt mean that to you and your heart that it isnt right. if it feels right in your heart then you do what is best for you.
i hope that came out right and not sounding mean. and again hugs.
You know I'm here for you hun!! You are stronger than you know, and staying does not make you weak at all!! I hope you can continue to heal and know that I am praying for you!
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